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New Horror-Web Chat

Horror-Web has invited me back for an online chat (open to the public…come on by!) on Wednesday, 12/22, 5pm central time.

Here’s the details from their website:

The Ghosts of Christmas, er Horror-Web Past… Chat ! That’s right… we’ve had too much egg nog already and think this would be fun [or insane, either works!]. Did you miss a chat guest this year? Wanna escape the holidays and just have total chaotic fun for an hour or two? Then come to chat with us!! Confirmed guests: Camden Toy, Tim Lebbon, Michael Arnzen, John Lawson, James Moore… more guests and details to come!

Log on to the chat here.



Left Behind

leftbehind-arnzen.jpg

This collage appears in Eye Contact, the literary magazine I advise at Seton Hill University where I teach. The theme for this particular issue of the magazine was “truth.” I clipped words and phrases out of Weekly World News; when I began, I thought I’d build a collage of freaky and bizarre headlines, but I found myself instead pulling out the more “normal” terms and assembling them in an abnormal way. The “shout out” style of the excessive typography, I’m hoping, renders everything strangely familiar. I believe the “left behind” phrase at the center originally referred to that whole “Left Behind” Armageddon novel series phenomena, but for me it seemed to progressively suggest something entirely different about the No Child Left Behind Act as I built this collage around it as a centerpiece. I’m still not sure what it all means, if anything at all.

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Horrorshow Horrors

For your next movie night, rent:

American Movie (1999)
Shadow of the Vampire (2000)
Wes Craven’s New Nightmare (1994)

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Fashion is Ugly

Ugly Bridesmaid Dresses
http://www.uglydress.com/index.html

Ugly Necklaces
http://www.landofodds.com/store/uglynecklace.htm

Nasty Old Neckties
http://www.geocities.com/RodeoDrive/4026/index.html



A Murder of Scarecrows

Having figured out that scarecrows are really just straw, the jaded ravens are pulling the stuffed dummies apart with their nasty little beaks. But you can bring them back to life by zinging magic seeds to them from nearby trees. Make sense? Well, it will if you check out the artful and surprisingly difficult game from The Skeleton Shop, “A Murder of Scarecrows.” In something akin to “Tim Burton meets Missile Command,” this game will keep you entertained for hours. Be sure to read the opening poem and remember to ring the churchbell to resurrect the dead!

http://www.theskeletonshop.com/



Eve by Aurelio O’Brien

I don’t read science fiction novels as often as I used to, but some book premises are so wacky that you just gotta see whether the author can pull them off. Such is the case with Eve by Aurelio O’Brien, a bizarre story about an outdated robot and his owner, lost amid a Huxlean culture in the distant future. In the 31st century, death is an anachronism, and bio-engineered “creature comforts” dominate the world, functioning solely to keep humans (a.k.a. “Randoms” since they weren’t technologically programmed or engineered) in an eternal state of bliss. Machines are an anachronism — mankind has engineered biomass servants that exist solely to please itself. Things are so perfect that the meaningfulness of life itself has gone sour. Penster (a relic robot) and Govil (his ancient owner) have become so alienated by their amazingly lifeless world of living matter that, as an act of resistance, they team up to create something “random” again from recycled biomass — setting out to construct a deliberately average woman, whom they term Eve. And once a new “random” is created, it threatens the system, because unlike the rest of humanity, she hasn’t been sterilized to control overpopulation.

I hope my plot description hasn’t lost you. The story is clever, but complicated, and it takes a lot of exposition — albeit humorous — for O’Brien to build to his world of living commodity fetishes. At the center is GenieCorp — a 31st century corporation that has taken control of the world — which manufactures strange devices out of biomass, servicing all human desires with freakish living creatures. For example, “Snakelights” are literally snakes with lights in their bodies rather than the Black & Decker tools we know so well, and “VolksvaagenBugs” are insectoid carriers with seats embedded in the thorax. There are plenty of these puns on commercial culture throughout the book — indeed, encountering ServAnts and AlarmCocks and other animated commodities is half the fun of the book. They make Eve at once unique, witty, and a lot of fun to read. It’s almost cartoony in its outrageous humor — something like Futurama or The Jetsons as told by a mutation between David Cronenberg and Aldous Huxley. His writing is not composed as artfully as a Mark Leyner or a Philip K. Dick, but O’Brien’s postmodern science fiction is deftly imagined and he manages to generate one hell of an entertaining satire on consumer culture with Eve.

The book has some weaknesses: Eve gets off to a slow start because O’Brien’s 31st century world is so intricately designed. The use of an emotionless robot narrator generates some droll humor at times (“Upon returning home, Eve made a beeline for the bathroom and sealed herself in. She sat in there for 00:56:02 and cried.”) At times, the punning goes over-the-top so much that it wears thin. But the silliness of the world makes it all the more fascinating to a reader like me, who loves mutants. However, the book’s major weakness is a reliance on the shopworn “Adam & Eve” conceit (that the title makes explicit), considered by many to be one of the biggest cliches of the science fiction genre. Couple that with the Pygmalion plot and you might start to think that the narrative could use a little more cleverness to match the book’s imaginative universe. But O’Brien — whose background, incidentally, is in animation — is careful not to give plot itself much dramatic weight. He’s really just borrowing the structure to play out his imagination and generate a never-ending series of witty barbs at modern culture. And the creativity that’s evident everywhere in O’Brien’s hilarious satire of consumer culture makes it a terrific read.

Visit evethenovel.com for a battery of animated illustrations of the best of his Creature Comforts and a far better description of the plot than I can muster. (Be sure to click on the “Lick-n-Span” image — it’s what won me over when I first encountered the website). If you’re looking for a good laugh, and you enjoy light SF, I think you’ll really like this book. It’s a wonderful critique of the suburbanite’s American dream, shot through the lens of its most hedonistic desires. Available in paperback, hardcover, and e-book editions from the author’s website, AuthorHouse.com, or amazon.com.

http://evethenovel.com
http://www.authorhouse.com/BookStore/ItemDetail.aspx?q3=jYmNivsu1mM=